Fuck It I'm 50

I’m back and I’m boring.

I’ve burrowed into Liseland and the short days, and sit at my edit station and pour over dead Mama footage and write grants and think of the meaning of life.

Work now for release later.

Except the current lack of external input as a prelude to explosions of activity and excitement later.

Notice when the clock turns to 47 minutes past the hour and be happy that you are paying attention to time.

I really have nothing to say for myself except that I have a cold, I miss Lee and Laurie, though I am happy and very productive being alone, I have the stamina to wake up, get to the tasks at hand and fulfill them.

My head is shaping up.

I met with Henry, one of my dear friends from a thousand years ago and now a very groovy LA talent rep with a new company, and most importantly a producer on Saltwater, this morning. Seeing myself in his eyes is a trip. I am beginning to see how others see me, and it is all finally making sense.

I am the artist, the weird one, the dreamer, the content provider. I used to scoff at that term during the dot com years-but that’s what I am and I need to 1-enjoy and expand upon this privilege and 2-make some serious money with this new found identity, (that has been there for a long time, but due to my headspace and how others saw me it wasn’t adding up). Now I can peddle my experience and skills in a new light. Pay me to think and produce.

Can it be real?

I will certainly report back.

Avoiding a broken heart gets you moving in all kinds of directions…

Meanwhile, back on the ranch Lefty is one sorry pup. I need to figure out a play routine with her. I am used to cats and old dogs and good roommates, but I have a young dog I try to drag to every event I can, (note to self-take her to work on Thursday), but I don’t play at home, so I don’t play with her. I promise to be more fun Miss Lefty.

And I promise to take advantage of the upcoming social whirl this holiday month coming up. I have talked Cynthia into coming out to meet and greet and I want to capture some of the holiday spirit, ignore the holidays, and carry that enthusiasm and devil may care attitude into the New Year.

And I have officially decided, with a little  help from my friends, to officially postpone Saltwater into later 2010. I will be in touch with all involved and feel this is good for the team, the film, me, and Lefty.

For all of you have been involved, and continue to be involved in Saltwater, her timeless beauty awaits us and I could not have made her as beautiful as she is without you. we are not going anywhere, we are just taking a little more time.