Blog Lite
I hate that here in the last throws of this, my dear blog, I am rushing a post, not thinking about you as I write now; even while I think of your imminent demise, on and off every day now.
Just like a criminal going to the death chamber, and there is no governor’s reprieve, this is it, you are going to die.
Wow, yucky imagery. But who hasn’t thought of that? What it would be like to be aware of your last moments?
But I am not here to ponder that now.
What am I here to ponder now?
That I am once again a wound ball of stress and anxiety. But not as bad as I used to be, not as bad as last year under comparable circumstances. A gift of reflection from my dear blog.
I was visiting briefly with my friend and coworker Dina in the early evening before a series of Replika meetings back to back until 10pm, and got to reflect on…I forget.
Under saner circumstances I would have deleted this shaggy dog story, but I think it sums up where I am at-the intersection of monkey mind swinging from tree to tree meets steel enforced mind that can only handle the task at hand.
Hence I write here, but the distraction of Laurie taking out ice cubes and Lefty’s interest in this activity distracted me enough to completely forget what I was going to write.
Does this happen to you?
I am full bore on producing this short and it is taking my breath away. Working for a first time director is wonderful and awful. I don’t know if I will get the time before this beautiful albatross dies to fully explain…but working in film is always challenging, and always engaging. Patty likened my role as lead producer tonight as comparable to leading a small nation. While the analogy is pretty right on, who would want to lead a small, or large nation for that matter? All those politicians need to get their heads and personalities checked, and oh yeah, egos. The folks who are motivated through altruism are bound to fail, you need so many other leadership deceits/skills, or in the case of the last George, the right incarnations with quick evil minds around you.
I am going off and rambling.
Today I learned a lot about special effects contact lenses and other things too.
I have also decided to have a good bye blog, happy 51st low key birthday party next Wednesday at 323, come by, and say bye to FIIF and buy a print, they’re going like hotcakes.
OK, I am over my lite limit in this not lite ramble.
I am anxious about my blog dying, but I am also anxious about a bunch of other things right now, so get in line little sister.
